Saturday, December 5, 2015
HOW TO ROB A BANK (2007)
Written & Directed By: Andrew Jenkins
Director Of Photography: Joe Meade
Editors: Dennis M. Hill & M. Scott Smith
Cast: Nick Stahl, Erika Christensen, Gavin Rossdale, Terry Crews, Leo Fitzpatrick, David Carradine
Jinx has coasted through life oblivious to the world around him and without a care in the world. His life is thrown into a spin when he gets caught in the middle of a bank heist and is forced to arbitrate this intense situation between the thieves and the police.
It's hard for me to admit it, but this is one film that should have never been made. it's slick production values for such a low-budget tries to be eye candy but it doesn't distract from the films many short-cummings.
The Film is a waste of time. that's what it robbed me of. the film feels like a Tarantino wannabe. there were a wae of these type of films after the release of pulp fiction and they all ranged from bad to worse which adds to this films many problems this one just happened to come 14 years too late and it still sucks.
It's not entertaining to watch actors talking ..phones for most of the films 81 minutes. yes this film is that short and feels much longer. this film also has the lamest cops in the world who don't seem know the proper procedure or have a decent hostage negotiator. these cops are even worse then the cops in comedies who are supposed to be inept.
The actors run the gamut to looking miserable and embarassed, to guilty and unhappy for accepting the money and not being given proper direction. The twists in this movie could be seen a mile away and were not that twisty to begin with. what was with Erika Christensen's wig ? why does she give up info so quickly if she is a professional? He complains he has to go to the bathroom and is hungry eventually he does go to the bathroom in the vault. but yet she never has to go. How can they stay that long in the vault with no feed or water and no distress from not having any of these? Plus earlier in the film they make a point of him being hungry and getting tired from lack of food but is never brought up again.
There are just too many questions and not enough answers. The whole point in a good movie or a movie in general is that everything is in the script or the movie for a reason such as that it can be brought up later at some vital point in the story. you are not supposed to put things there just to be there. That is just lazy or bad story-telling. This film has a lot of that.
The bank robbers outside the vault have nothing to do really so they are just standing around trying to look relevant when they are not. there is also a lot of inappropriate humor in the wrong places and times. like in the middle of a serious dramatic scene that just throws off whatever rhythm the movie had going for it in the first place. the film seems to run out of ideas very fast and coasts after they do. The plot of the movie in fact seems more inspired by a rant of the main character then by actual characters or stories.
At least the film wisely knows not to dwell on too much and keep the story and action moving.
There is even one scene of a hostage who we later see no blood around her still laying there then near the end we finally see a pool of blood was the budget so low as to not show it? was it a artistic decision? why even do it if it doesn't matter as it was filmed it seemed more like it was a fake shooting to convince the cops he was serious then all of a sudden we never really know or find out.
The plot is a regular guy who comes in to get his last $20 out of his account walks into a bank robbery and when he is shot at runs into a vault where another robber is. they are accidently locked inside the vault then the cops show up making this a 2-way hostage situation.
The full list of tips shown throughout the film on how to rob a bank are:
Tip #1 - Decide to rob a bank.
Tip #2 - Have a plan.
Tip #3 - Have a back-up plan.
Tip #4 - Establish clear communications.
Tip #5 - Choose your partners carefully.
Tip #6 - Expect the unexpected.
Tip #7 - Shit happens.
Tip #8 - Don't get greedy.
Tip #9 - Remember, shit happens.
Tip #10 - Hang up and know when to walk away.